FA Cup

Fulham 0-4 Tottenham Hotspur

Fuck yes. Suck it, Cottagers- two goals apiece from Robbie Keane and Dimitar Berbatov were good enough to cock slap Fulham. Despite having the majority of possession, Fulham were otherwise lackluster. Hopefully, Spurs can build on this performance, and start a good run going into the final stretch of the season.

Copa America

The United States drew Argentina, Colombia, and Paraguay in the first round of the Copa America. Despite the inevitable humiliation from Argentina, Paraguay and Colombia are winnable games. It's important that America consistently tries to play in these types of tournaments- friendlies against Denmark's B team aren't going to get them respect on the international stage- or get them ready for any sort of major competition.

for fuck's sake...

Sheffield 2-1 Tottenham

Really? Sheffield United? What the fuck. Honestly. What the fuck are you doing?

spurs just LOVE the mediocrity

Tottenham Hotspur, as rumors go, are looking at Everton striker James Beattie. That wouldn't be newsworthy if he wasn't fucking terrible. With four strikers already, it would certainly appear that someone is on his way out- Jermaine Defoe has been a Chelsea target, Aston Villa and Celtic are apparently looking at Robbie Keane, and Mido has been linked with every mid-table team in Europe's major leagues. Really, Martin Jol, why would you do this? Do we need the soccer equivalent of impotence up front? No. No we do not. For a club with supposed aspirations of the Champions League, we sure seem to be targeting tenth place right now.

international friendly roundup

U.S.A. 2-0 Mexico

A decent performance from America, despite not having many chances they converted off a corner and a deflection off of a ref. Before everyone begins to start talking about removing the "interim" from new coach Bob Bradley's job title, let's remember- rarely controlling possession outside of your own half and scoring a fluke goal with 45 seconds left does not a dominant coach make. In that same area, before we talk about a Landon Donovan comeback, it's important to remember that his goal was kind of flukish, and that if you watch the tape, it looks like he was trying to dump it off- notice the hand-waving about halfway into his run- he really did look like he was more comfortable giving the chance to someone else. Or maybe it was just a clever feint. Shades of Ghana, perhaps? A solid performance by Johnathan Bornstein, quality saves from Tim Howard- though he got caught out in no-man's land once or twice on crosses, an area he absolutely needs to work on, and another good job by Jimmy Conrad. Chris Rolfe blew, quite frankly, doing nothing creatively, and as far as the announcers go, Bruce Arena continues to baffle me- how did a man who gives the impression of such a low amount of soccer knowledge get a job coaching what is supposed to be a major soccer team?

England 0-1 Spain

Watching the English national team is, to me, not unlike watching mediocre pornography. You'e got poor direction (really, Steve McLaren? you aren't going to put anyone on the fucking left?) uninspiring performance- Peter Crouch just isn't very good against a major international team, and Gary Neville looked woefully out of place, though you can't really blame him for his manager's tactical impotence, and, in the end, Andres Iniesta's money shot all over the face of the England side. Frank Lampard, I'll go get you a towel.

first post

This is a blog based, obviously, on soccer- MLS, the EPL, and such. I should say that I am a Tottenham Hotspur supporter, so there will be a focus on them, to a certain extent, though that of course is assuming that I don't just fucking give up on them after Martin Jol's next monumental tactical error. And yet... I digress. This is the first post, and I hope to have daily updates on the world of soccer.